“Women Scandalously Dressed”

Two missionaries felt that Hungarians have a spiritual crisis in sentimental relationships. Overplayed sexual overtones in advertising in their eyes reflected an unhealthy sex mania among Hungarians. The Canadian man said it is no secret that Hungarians divorce so much when the sexual relationship, which should bond a husband and wife in the intimacy of their bedroom, is made so public. He was convinced that Hungary would be a much happier place if people would honor the Biblical values of faithfulness in marriage, and abstinence until marriage. He believes that Hungarians are obsessed with sex and this creates much more long – term heartache than the temporary satisfaction of a sexual experience.

He added, “Most normal Hungarian people want to marry and raise a happy family. When someone is sexually active before marriage, they take baggage from the previous relationships into the marriage and that only makes it more difficult. Then they must not only work out the issues they face with the partner they want to spend their whole life with but everything that came in the previous relationships enters in.”

It once again seems to show how the Hungarian mentality is like the Rubik’s cube. The simple way is also the Biblical way- you marry your partner and both work out the problems and the piece of paper is a guarantee that this is a lifetime commitment.

It is not fair to throw this way of thinking at the Hungarians only as everywhere- especially Europe; it seems that people are going a different direction than the traditional way of marriage and family.

The problem however, is that Hungarians tend to want a traditional family life but see it as something that they can not attain to. They are worried about economic issues and seem to be afraid of the lifetime commitment of marriage.

One solution many try is that of having a life partner without marriage. But is this better? Often those who are living together with someone will say, “What difference does a piece of paper make?” The kind of relationship that is almost a marriage but not quite a marriage produces the same expectations of a married couple- faithfulness, spend time together, work out economic and sentimental problems, etc.

In every relationship where two people become one, there are many obstacles to overcome. It sounds logical, but when the problems come, it is much easier to just say, “goodbye” when there is no piece of paper than to work out everything and come to some kind of solution. The piece of paper means that if a couple wants to escape this contract; they have to work as hard at the divorce as at solving their problems. Sometimes that happens but it forces them to make a clear decision.

Without the paper, there is absolutely no security. Then when the relationship does not work, both of them must start all over again and it begins an endless cycle moving from relationship to relationship until both grow old and are alone. It seems that though it may seem convenient is the short term, in the long term it complicates people’s lives and adds to their unhappiness.

One missionary said, “I will only let you quote me if you keep me anonymous, I don’t want anyone throwing me off the Petőfi Bridge. I think that Hungarian women dress scandalous. I have traveled the world and nowhere have I seen women so scandalously dressed. I believe that somewhere in the Hungarian culture fathers don’t communicate well with daughters. I believe girls are crying for male attention and understanding. When Hungarian girls dress so scandalous they are little girls crying out for daddy’s attention. What they really want is to be loved and respected by the most significant male in their life”

One girl, a nineteen year-old Latin American student said, “With all the prostitution and sexual overtones in the advertising the girls feel an incredible pressure to be attractive to guys. The problem is when they dress like this, they will probably attract the wrong kind of guys.”

Hungarian culture, relationships, love, marriage, intimacy, morality, conscience, motives, ethic, men, women, dress, Christian perspective