How to be a Yank - The American Century
How to be a Yank - excerpts
by George Mikes
THE AMERICAN CENTURY
The position of the American in his own estimation. The curvature of the earth’s surface renders it impossible to observe this position without some distortion of perspective. The possible margin of error in the above diagram is about the width of the Atlantic Ocean.
But can we trust them as leaders? . . . When I was a small boy we used to play football every Saturday afternoon in the field (it would be called the village green in England). Our centre forward was always the same little boy, let’s call him Sammy. There was always a great deal of argument as to who should be in the team and what position one or another boy should occupy. But there was never any argument about the position of the centre-forward. It had to be Sammy. He was not a very good player; he could not use his left foot at all. But he wanted to play centre-forward and centre-forward he played. The ball belonged to him.
- excerpt from How to be a Yank by George Mikes
How to be a Yank - How to Die
How to be a Yank - excerpts
by George Mikes
HOW TO DIE
“Why, Elmer, its perfect!”
- excerpt from How to be a Yank by George Mikes
How to be a Yank - The Language
How to be a Yank - excerpts
by George Mikes
THE LANGUAGE
It was decided almost two hundred years ago that English should be the language spoken in the United States. It is not known, however, why this decision has not been carried out.
- excerpt from How to be a Yank by George Mikes
